Impulsive Consequences
by Olivia Y
Summary: (5x3) Sometimes, you let logic guide you. Other times, you are guided by impulse alone...and when you act on impulse, the consequences are never easy to deal with.


**Impulsive Consequences**

**PROLOGUE**

It's been more than a year since we started out on this so-called mission.

A year.

Do you have any idea how long a time that is? Let's see, there are three hundred and sixty five days in a year, twenty four hours per day, sixty minutes in each hour, and sixty seconds to each minute…that's thirty-one million, five hundred and thirty-six thousand seconds.

And that's hell of a long time.

Knowing the kind of person I am, one may be surprised to hear me complain about traveling. After all, being on the road all the time promises consistent changes in scenery, if nothing else, and traveling from one town to the next, to the next to the next to the next…has the wonderful consequence of having a fresh river of females to fish from by every passing town. Surely, that would be more than enough to make up for all those hours of the dusty roads?

Originally, perhaps I would've enjoyed this trip more, I mean, at least I'd never get bored. There's the monkey for starters, who never seems to run out of energy for a good all-out bellowing session in the back of the Jeep; there's the regularly scheduled demon attacks, always beneficial for staying in shape on this sitting-down kind of trip; and when we're off the road, Hakkai's always in the mood for a nice game of cards. Hell, why wouldn't he be? It's not so much as a gamble as a way of passing time with decided outcomes.

Yes, this trip would've been a lot more fun…but for the one element that overshadows all other factors that this package deal of a road trip came with. One element, that is the source of my discomfort, my anxiety, and lack of pursuit.

And that element is Genjo Sanzo.

Sanzo. I've known this guy for more than four years now, and still I understand him no better than I did the night I first met him. In fact, I think I learned more about him in that one night than I have in the four years since, and that was more out of sheer consequence than anything else.

I used to think I was pretty good at reserving my own emotions, and despite my enthusiasm for socializing, was an expert at avoiding sentimental attachment, by all means. So good at it, I almost took pride in it.

But the minute I laid eyes on him, I knew I was outmatched.

One would think that after all we've been through together, after all that time we've spent together since setting out on this journey to the west, the barriers we've built for ourselves would've started to crumble by now. Though, sure enough, for some of us this was true. Hakkai no longer feels the need to hide away whenever memories of his past, and of his lover come back to him, and Goku's always been as east to read as a blank piece of paper, probably as intelligent too…

Even I…

Even I had shown them the scars which I bear. Not every one of them perhaps, but enough to know I don't hurt alone.

But as for him…

…

From the very start, I knew he was different. Oh sure I've met some pretty amazing people in my life…Hakkai been the most recent, no way can you classify him as ordinary…but Sanzo, he wasn't just unique, he wasn't just amazing…

He was special.

That is…to _me. He was special to _me_._

 It wasn't the kind of connection I had felt with Hakkai. Hakkai was a mystery, Hakkai was intriguing. Hakkai carried secrets that I knew he would reveal to me over time. Hakkai knew me, he could understand me, he could see right through any mask I tried to pull. He is my friend, he is my soul mate. He was special to me too, so very much so.

But Hakkai never roused within me those things I felt the very first moment I laid my eyes on that beautiful, blond priest. That one fateful night.

It's been a long time since we've talked about that night, a very long time. But I know that the memory of it has not faded the slightest bit for any of us…well, for Goku maybe, I think his memory of what he ate for lunch that day is probably more vivid than that first encounter with me or Hakkai…but the rest of us…

It was the night during which the hand of fate had reached into our lives, and bound us firmly together with the chains of destiny.

Every detail, from the very beginning…

…

_I opened the door. He looked at me. I saw his eyes…_

_I watched his lips move. He asked me a question. I heard his voice…_

_I denied his accusation. He stood his ground. I witnessed that expression…_

_He tried to cut through. I blocked his path. I sensed his anger…_

_He reached for the doorknob. I held his wrist to stop him. I felt his pulse…_

_We fought, we struggled…I experienced his strength, both of body and of will._

_And from then on…I knew…_

_I was finished._

_Genjo Sanzo._

…

By day and by night, by mountains and by forests, by deserts and by glaciers…

Through countless attacks from demons or gods, through blood and sin and corruption and death…

Still scarred by our pasts, still haunted by old nightmares, still feeling the pain of those never-healing wounds…

In the midst of fighting, arguing, laughter, tears, and a cloud of cigarette smoke…

The journey goes on.


End file.
